In Between Worlds

Firstly, I signed up to be a Radish writer. The acquisition associate emailed me a few days ago and we chatted via email (since time zones!).

Secondly, I am currently sore, due to hormones. Even in my 40s and experiencing perimenopause, the cramps are just as bad.

So yes, this is my week. I am experiencing the effects of anxiety from two weeks - I desperately need a break away from this country. I want a walkabout.

The sky is cloudy and I am waiting for the thunderstorm to hit.

With a slew of medical appointments this month (mine and family's), my wallet feels the impact, like a bone-crunching blow to my solar plexus. Next slew will be in November.

I am suddenly tempted... really tempted... to go back to full-time work.

If you want to help (like donate a coin or two), I would greatly appreciate it.

My Patreon link: Patreon.
My Kofi link: Kofi.

If you would like to buy books (pdfs):

My Gumroad.

Currently struggling with funk that doesn't go away and trying to meet deadlines (now extended).

I shared this on my blog, Twitter and FB...

But yes, I haven't posted this on DW...

I signed a deal/contract with Scholastic Asia. The novel is a YA sword fantasy.

that people keep on telling people with depression to reach out... And so they do, baring their souls and guts, only to be gaslit by the very same people.

Irony is not just a metal in the universe.

This week has been an emotional roller-coaster. It started with a Google Hangout with university students, talking about Lotus, my short in We See A Different Frontier and the motivations behind it, plus social justice and activism. Then, my mom went for her surgery. She's healing fine, but it was the wait that almost killed me and my dad waiting at the waiting room.

Then, Patreon had to be a tool and made me anxious with my income/revenue streams all over again. I took this year off for health reasons, with writing being my main source of income. So, it's back to a job hunt again, though I started this rolling. So, we see how that goes and how much people really want Southeast Asian science fiction and fantasy by Southeast Asian writers living IN Southeast Asia.

I wrote my Patrons a long letter as well. The letter includes alternatives how to support me as well as links to my books under various awesome publishers.

Last night, I had a dream and I never have dreams that stick anymore, probably due to mental exhaustion. In this dream, all I could remember was walking through a housing estate with lush greenery and fruits growing on trellises. Vine fruits, hanging, growing lush and abundant. I pray this is a good sign for next year, that the seeds I planted really bear fruit.

Happier things: I went for a networking talk where the speaker spoke about starting your own business. Spoke to many women and gave out my contacts. Also, with things a bit clearer, I can really start planning and putting down things.

I am really grateful for the people who stepped up when I really needed help and are there when I am down. Thank you.

Yes, I made the decision to buy the remainder of the Rider and Speaker books as they are not selling. Sales have been bad. The books have not been moving just as quickly as I'd though. Not sure whether it's due to marketing or that Singapore's indeed a small market - but I think it's time to take them off the shelves.
They have languished long enough. :/

That the remainder cost approx. 800 SGD... well, will be a strain on my pockets, but I pray the pain is worth it.

EDIT: If you can't help, just say so. Don't have to tell me "I am sorry" or "At least you have some sales, but sadly most don't have".

EDIT 2: I was receiving responses like the ones seen above.

Apparently, it was a day of deja vu when I sliced off a bit of my left finger while pruning my butterfly pea plant. Shock, followed by pain and a bit of half-laughing, half-crying, and off I went to my general practitioner who dressed it, said it was a clean wound ("shaving accident") and gave me a booster jab.

Why I said deja vu was that I did something similar to the same finger a long time ago while I was still studying in Australia. :D

No painkillers, just the ache of my bruised ego

I am back from Cambodia. Flew back exactly a week ago. Siem Reap was hot, dry, but an eye-opening experience. Plus, the fried crickets were delicious, yum. Coming back was a culture shock - so much privilege, people taking things for granted.

Then, it's back to normal programming again. I need to plan... things, especially for two books. I ended up starting a new scarf, because this is how I plan: I knit. It's a meditative process where my mind lays out stuff while the needles move.

So, that's about it, small updates. :D